Lost Dog

January 7, 2009


Have you seen this dog?

Worth - missing!
Worth – missing!

Worth, aged 2, went missing recently. He was last seen outside a Woolworths store in Wigan last week while his ‘best friend’, Wooly, was inside checking for bargain priced pick ā€˜nā€™ mix.

There have been a lot of changes in his life recently that could lead to his estrangement; the family company has gone bust, he lost his job, and the sheep to which he was once in command of has become a lover – which of course would be an increase in the mental turmoil of any hardworking dog. Though such a young pup we fear he may have been led astray recently and there are a couple of dubious characters that we would like to bring in for questioning.

Suspect One: Worth-Vader

This odd man went to the house of Wooly and Worth a couple of weeks ago attempting to sell them duct tape. Though Wooly claims to have found him to be slightly creepy, Worth certainly took a shining to him and we fear he may have agreed to meet up with him without Wooly’s presence.

We would like to question this dark individual, if not just so we can exclude him from suspicion.

Do you know his whereabouts?

Has he been seen with a dog that looks like Worth?

Please let us know if so!

Suspect Two: Jackie Chan

Jackie was last seen in the middle of rush hour on the M6 towards Liverpool 2 days ago. Though he is unarmed he is extremely dangerous and should not be approached under any circumstances. He may be in disguise, so please also take great care around any monkeys that you see – especially if there is a panda in the vicinity.

Please, if you have any idea where Worth – or either of these individuals are – please let your local dog pound know.

Wooly is distraught!
Wooly is distraught!


4 Responses to “Lost Dog”

  1. Wavatar Tah on January 8th, 2009 8:47 am

    Uhh… oooooooh-kay.

    I have a feeling there is a cultural separation here that I am not able to bridge at this time.

  2. Wavatar murphyz on January 8th, 2009 9:13 am

    Wooly and Worth, the sheep and the dog, are two mascots for Woolworths who are a British institution, aged 99 years, who closed the last of their stores this week after going into administration.

    End of an era, as they say.


  3. Wavatar Stevie on January 8th, 2009 10:06 pm

    You need to get out more, and search for a psychiatrist. Did you get a last pick n mix before it closed? Sxx

  4. Wavatar Tah on January 9th, 2009 6:15 am

    I had a feeling Wooly and Worth were somehow tied to Woolworth’s, but wasn’t familiar with them.

    Umm, sorry for your loss?

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